I vow..

… to always be true
To hold on to You ’til the end
Jesus, glory to You
My Saviour, my King and my friend

I relent

As I sit in the bunk where I’ve spent the past 9 weeks, I’m not quite sure how to feel. Ok well perhaps I’m guilty of never quite bothering to stop and contemplate ANY feelings of Tekong before; I guess it’s good then that I find myself here, alone, free to think, reminisce, and take stock of stuff that have happened in the past 2.5 months or so.

I guess the bunk always means something special to Tekong recruits. For one, it’s a haven. Within the walls of this living space, one can be one’s true self – or at least the truest one can be on this island. Out come the slippers, off come the tops (and sometimes bottoms, too), and one begins to feel a little bit more at home. Contraband food items start to appear too – biscuits, cookies, nutella tubs, you name it. Comfort foods of every kind, being shared around during those precious ‘lepak’ moments we were granted. Haha. In the bunk, pretences were stripped (most of them, at least), and we returned to being the boys we were, counting down the days to our next bookout, heh.

The bunk was also a place where fellowship took place, and section mates shared about their lives. In such conversations one appreciates the results of different upbringings, value systems and enculturalisation, but also brings to realisation the similarities that we humans share, in spite of everything. Many people were met on Tekong, and in my bunk especially I got to meet interesting, and varied personalities.

The bunk will also always be significant to recruits because it is there he reconnects with the civilian life he left behind. The iPods, the phonecalls, the smses, everything. Oh, the phonecalls! Haha the sustained phonecalls after lights out and through the night; the smiles and giggles of bunkmates as they whispered sweet nothings to their loved ones; even the defeated tearful eyes as some received unpleasant news from the mainland – all these are memories that will be associated with the bunk.

So come to think of it, there are stuff to be sentimental about if one so decides. But strangely enough that brand of emotion has yet, to hit me.

Perhaps I really have changed

Question is:

Should I try clinging on to the Kenneth of Then,

Or throw Caution, Reservation, and Restraint to the wind

and embrace the New?

Oh my hart

As the deer panteth for the water
So my soul longeth after you
You alone are my heart’s desire
And I long to worship you

You alone are my strength, my shield
To you alone may my spirit yield
You alone are my heart’s desire
And I long to worship you

You’re my friend and you are my brother
Even though you are a king
I love you more than any other
So much more than anything

You alone are my strength, my shield
To you alone may my spirit yield
You alone are my heart’s desire
And I long to worship you

I want you more than gold or silver,
only you can satisfy.
You alone are the real joygiver
and the apple of my eye.

You alone are my strength, my shield
To you alone may my spirit yield
You alone are my heart’s desire
And I long to worship you